Today we’d like to introduce you to Candy McVicar.
Candy, we appreciate you taking the time to share your story with us today. Where does your story begin?
I was a successful businesswoman in the corporate world and left that behind to form my own company, so I could work from home and raise my children. My company was growing, along with my belly, but our big plans abruptly all changed when our beautiful daughter Grace was stillborn on December 20, 2001. In an instant, our lives were forever altered.
My career aspirations waned as my passions shifted to honoring the life of my daughter and helping others who were also in this new world of grief that I was now immersed within. Just a few months after burying our firstborn, we founded the Missing GRACE Foundation with the desire to let others know they were not alone and there was a supportive peer community of grieving moms and dads they could be connected to.
Now over 20 years later, we have helped tens of thousands of families across the nation by providing grief resources and GRACE Care Packages to hospitals and clinics, classes for care professionals, mailed resources, phone and online assistance, support groups, a Center of hope and healing, retreats, conferences, and memorial events.
Alright, so let’s dig a little deeper into the story – has it been an easy path overall and if not, what were the challenges you’ve had to overcome?
Learning how to run a nonprofit was not something I had done before. It was all new and I had to learn as I went along and it was a lot to figure out. I did a ton of research and asked lots of questions of others who had started nonprofits. Many aspects in this arena are in my wheelhouse such as organizing, planning, equipping, and being a hands-on helper who likes to serve others.
Thankfully, the areas that are not in my wheelhouse, happen to be in my husband’s, and he has been able to partner with me by helping in those areas. Had I not had him working with me on this venture I don’t think we would be where we are today. We are a great team and are grateful to be part of an even larger team of amazing volunteers. We have been blessed to work with incredible volunteers through the years that have become family.
We have also had challenging situations though which I’ve learned is not that uncommon for nonprofits, and that is when volunteers you have high hopes for don’t happen to work out.
As you know, we’re big fans of you and your work. For our readers who might not be as familiar what can you tell them about what you do?
I am personally an author, inspirational speaker, and devoted advocate for families who are grieving a baby or child. I co-authored “Holding on to Love After You’ve Lost a Baby – The 5 Love Languages® for Grieving Parents” with New York Times best-selling author, Dr. Gary Chapman. I am the co-founder and Executive Director of a 501 (c) 3 nonprofit public charity called the Missing GRACE Foundation.
I have been married and serving in ministry together with my husband, Stephen, for twenty-three years. I am a mom to four – two on earth and two in heaven. I have extensive experience working with bereaved families and within healthcare systems. I volunteered for ten years in hospital birthing rooms and NICUs, supporting hundreds of perinatal loss families; providing grief doula services, and professional photography and videography. I facilitate grief support groups for parents and grandparents and provide facilitator training courses.
In 2003, I spearheaded legislation to help parents of a stillborn in Minnesota to receive their baby’s birth certificate. The bill was signed into law and enacted on August 1, 2005, bringing rightful recognition and dignity to stillborn babies.
I have been a featured guest on Fox News, Focus on the Family, Building Relationships with Dr. Gary Chapman, and hundreds of radio shows, videocasts, and podcasts. I enjoy speaking at hospitals, clinics, universities, churches, and conferences. I am a grief and trauma specialist on a mission to help couples and families grow closer together, heal, and find hope.
What do you think about happiness?
I think happiness is a choice. I think we can see and embrace the good and discover things that make us happy in every season of life. I work daily with grief and trauma which isn’t a happy topic or experience however, I can find something in each situation and each story that is hopeful and bright and help the families I work with to find hope and happiness too. I know there’s redemption in our stories and beauty for ashes over time.
There are many things that personally make me happy!
One that especially gives me joy is the calls from moms I have journeyed through grief with who share that they are pregnant after their challenging time with infertility and when their rainbow baby is here safely in their arms (the baby that is born after a loss). That news is pure bliss to my heart!
Family time with my girls and my hubby makes me very happy too. It brings a smile to my heart when everyone is in a silly mood and being goofy and having fun. That is a slice of happiness.
I find happiness in spending time with our sweet, derpy, Golden Retriever Anela, who we love dearly and our little dogs who crack us up with their shenanigans. My happy place is at the beach (love Hawaii), on a boat, or floating in my pool relaxing and reading on a warm sunny day.
What resources does your organization offer that you think people really appreciate? Anything in particular that you are especially proud of?
Knowing that 1 in 4 pregnancies ends in a pregnancy loss, I think our GRACE Care Packages would be the resource many of your readers would appreciate most should they find themselves or someone they know experiencing a loss. Missing GRACE Foundation provides grief resources designed and packaged with care to guide, support, and comfort parents before, during and after experiencing a pregnancy or infant loss. These materials and resources have been developed by grieving parents for grieving parents.
GRACE Care Packages can be ordered by phone or online and either picked up to be hand delivered or shipped directly to the recipient.
We have GRACE Care Packages for:
- hospitals, clinics and crisis pregnancy centers to give to patients/clients experiencing a pregnancy or infant loss
- moms actively miscarrying or giving birth at home to baby who will be stillborn or receiving palliative or hospice care
- moms who are grieving in the first year after their loss to give them comfort and hope
Pricing:
- “Pearl” GRACE Care Package for moms having an ectopic, molar, or miscarriage/ up to 19 weeks gestation (gender not known) $55
- “Jewel” or “Crown” GRACE Care Package for moms having a miscarriage up to 19 weeks gestation (boy or girl) $55
- “Prince” or “Princess” GRACE Care Package for moms having a premature birth, stillbirth, or neonate/ 20 weeks to full-term baby boy or girl $95
- “Tailor-made” GRACE Care Package for moms and dads needing a custom-made package after a baby or infant has already passed (the miscarriage completed, or the baby/infant has been buried or cremated already). Cost varies based on contents.
- “Solace” GRACE Care Package for the momma to bring her comfort and hope on her grief journey and uplift her in the first year after her little one has gone to heaven (first trimester loss and up to one year of age). $50
Contact Info:
- Website: www.missinggrace.org
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/missinggracefoundation/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MGFCenterforGRACE/
- Other: www.candymcvicar.com
Image Credits
Candy McVicar and Stephen McVicar
