Today we’d like to introduce you to Morgan Mohler.
Hi Morgan, we’re thrilled to have a chance to learn your story today. So, before we get into specifics, maybe you can briefly walk us through how you got to where you are today.
Have you ever seen that poster that is full of yellow ducks wandering in the same direction, but as you look closer, there is a white duck that is pushing through the crowd in the opposite direction? That is exactly what I felt like growing up in a small town where you were considered an odd duck if you wanted to do anything outside of the box. Don’t get me wrong, there was a time in my life when I did not want to be the odd duck; I stayed quiet and followed the cool crowd because I wanted so desperately to fit in while shutting down the yearning I felt in my core to be different. Please hear me when I say that shutting down your dreams will never be worth the “comfort” you think you feel trying to fit into the wrong crowd.
During the time trying to navigate high school cliques and decide on my career path, my grandparents began to show symptoms of memory loss. My mom, younger brother, and I spent countless hours trying to maintain their cognition and memories by playing cribbage and putting together puzzles, but that isn’t how Alzheimer’s Disease functions. If you have ever been touched by the cruel hand of dementia, you know what it’s like to lose someone you love not only once, but twice: first in personality/memory and second in the physical body. Both cause unimaginable grief.
Today, I can see clearly how all this set me up for all that I’m doing today. During my developmental years of being a teenager, I witnessed people I love lose all the memories they spent their lives making and because of this, I have dedicated my career to not letting anyone else suffer this loss as my family did. Let me also just insert here, you should’ve seen the looks I received from my peers at high school when I declared my new career as “curing Alzheimer’s Disease” #oddduck4ever. Yet, despite all those limiting beliefs and judgements, I graduated 3.5 years later with my Bachelor’s Degree of Science in Biochemistry to now be working at Mayo Clinic as a Clinical Research Coordinator in Neurology.
But that’s not all… I am also Miss St. Croix Valley 2023, a local titleholder within the Miss Minnesota and Miss America Organizations.
This dream was placed in my heart when I finally slowed down long enough to look back at the last five years of my life acknowledging that I went through a lot of stuff. It’s kind of like in Pretty Woman when Edward said it cost him ten thousand dollars in therapy to be able to say he was angry. I had that moment of acceptance and knew that if I was going through the lowest of valleys, other people were as well. That’s when the Miss America Opportunity fell right in front of me.
I created my platform/initiative, purchased the right attire, and paid the fees for my first competition. It almost seems too easy right? Well, a week before the show, I tested positive for COVID-19 and was put in isolation for 10 days. I was absolutely devastated but later discovered this perfect timing would lead me to a bigger purpose. I signed up for seven more competitions throughout the next year and a half before winning my title: Miss St. Croix Valley. Let me reiterate that I put myself on a stage to be judged by others seven times before being chosen to serve Minnesota in this role. Again, most people see situations like this as a set back, but it really should be considered a set-up. I decided with each competition that I was never meant to be in those programs at that time because I had so much growth to endure first. If you want to see massive success, realize that failure is not what you think it is. It is an opportunity for growth. Each day that my name wasn’t called, yes, I was upset 100%, BUT I learned something profound about myself. I was one step closer to becoming the version of myself that I am today and that makes the wait so worth it.
Because of all the adversity I’ve faced, I have made it my mission as Miss St. Croix Valley to identify those who can live lives of abundance but don’t know how to due to growing up in adversity or having predetermined notions that they are not good enough, not talented enough, and/or overall not able to succeed.
I’m sure you wouldn’t say it’s been obstacle free, but so far would you say the journey has been a fairly smooth road?
My journey to get to this place has not been a smooth road in the slightest.
As I was approaching high school graduation, everyone said I would be experiencing the best four years of my life. Little did any of us know at the time, my freshman year of college was going to be the hardest, most defeating year I ever experienced.
Before I even got moved into my dorm, my mom had knee surgery where they found many more problems than they originally anticipated. A fast, easy recovery turned into months of disability. Two months later, she was slowly returning to work with more mobility when she was struck head-on by a truck in a car accident that gave her a concussion and undid a lot of the progress she made in physical therapy.
I finally made it to Christmas break hoping for a relaxing, uneventful month away from school when what was left of my world came crumbling down. On December 24th, my mom, brother, and I went to our grandparents’ nursing home to visit as we had for years prior. Instead of leaving with Christmas cheer, we watched my grandfather go to sleep for the last time on morphine expecting him to pass in the hours/days to come. Christmas Day was pretty seldom and quiet, we didn’t receive a call. The next day though, the phone rang. My mom sat us kids on the couch but shared the news we didn’t expect, “it’s not Papa,” she said, “Your cousin, Tyler, was killed in a drunk driving accident. All I know is that he wasn’t the one driving.” Shocked and confused, we packed a to-go bag and visited my grandfather for the last time. He passed on December 27, 2018.
After a week-long event of funerals, I was expected to return to school. With a heavy heart, I went to softball, classes, and work trying to grasp any type of normal. I had never lost anyone before, so I didn’t know the proper process or how to manage these emotions.
During one of our 6 am practices, I was throwing soft tosses in the batting cage as I had done too many times before. I neglected the fact that I was pitching to a left-handed batter and was woken up with a 70 mph hit to the face. I sat down on the floor in disbelief slowly realizing what had just happened. I remember the whole thing; I didn’t pass out; I didn’t break a single bone; I was lucky. I did, however, have a horrible concussion that made Calculus II even more impossible to understand.
I recovered a few weeks later and was cleared to practice again. On February 28th, 2019, I had this gut feeling that instead of going to the gym for practice after class, I needed to stop by my dorm room first. I was debating turning around because I really didn’t need anything from my room, but that voice in my head was very persistent. When the elevator doors opened, my mom and a security guard were waiting for me. When my mom and I made eye contact, I knew that my grandma had passed away too. We went to my room, and chatted for a minute, then, as I only knew how to at the time, I returned to practice saying goodbye to my mom until the funeral.
Going through all this trauma in a new place with new people, it wasn’t super surprising that I developed severe anxiety. I was having routine panic attacks because I was convinced that more bad things were going to happen to me and more people in my life were going to be taken from me. Yet, I didn’t seek help for months.
In the spring, I finally decided that I didn’t feel like myself – the bubbly, adventurous Morgan had turned into a quiet, reserved Morgan. I had to do something. Thanks to a supportive friend, I was given an email address to contact the Franciscan Sisters of Perpetual Adoration. We set up a meeting. When I was there, I could barely get the words out to talk about how I was feeling because my throat physically constricted when I talked about my emotions. I later discovered why – I am an Enneagram 3w2 which means that I am someone who deeply struggles with showing emotion because I will think that I am a burden because I need to be achieving goals and helping everyone else.
Today, I understand my story. I continuously pursue personal development, manage my anxiety, and have developed a process to be successful in life through adversity. “Champions aren’t made when the game is easy in any area of life.” Believe It by Jamie Kern Lima. I truly believe that we go through hardships in life because we are meant to share a message of what we learned and did from that time, and that is exactly what I am doing as Miss St. Croix Valley.
Thanks – so what else should our readers know about your work and what you’re currently focused on?
As Miss St. Croix Valley, I teach others how to not only set goals but get goals. There is a huge disconnect where people will think about or even set resolutions and intentions, especially around New Year’s, but 93% will never actually achieve their goals. Most of this comes from a lack of dedication or belief in themselves to actually be successful pursuing their dreams, but sometimes it is because they are taking the wrong action steps. Seeing this affect so many people I love and our nation as a whole, I travel to teach my four-step process of “LIFE” that gives people space and intentionality to learn how to overcome limitations, imagine bigger dreams for their lives, focus on specific goals, and earn success. This simple process has been one that I personally use over and over to be in the 7% of people who achieve their goals.
Not only do I have the opportunity to speak about my initiative in public, but I am also working with organizations such as the YMCA’s Leadership Academy in Rochester, Minnesota Academy of Science, and Big Brothers Big Sisters to reach kids who will inevitably face adversity in their lives if they haven’t already. Being a part of these missions has opened my eyes even more to the gap we have in learning life skills like achieving and believing in ourselves.
Encouraging and uplifting others to pursue their biggest dreams has been the best part of my job as a titleholder thus far.
Is there anything else you’d like to share with our readers?
You deserve to discover your fullest potential. It happens so often that we get to a good place where we truly believe we can accomplish anything – if you don’t believe me, think of what you wanted to be when you were in first grade… I know no one was holding me back from being an astronaut then! We get to that highest of high but then something typically happens – we either doubt ourselves or someone else doubts us, then our bubble of dreams pops. What if I told you, it doesn’t have to pop? You get to decide what goes in your head, what stays there, and what is not welcome.
You get to decide if you are going to listen to them or pursue your dreams despite those voices. Let me also be honest in this, it is not easy. I have been working on myself through personal development for nearly three years, and while I don’t have it down perfectly, I see how differently my brain operates from when I first started. I know that if I have a bad day, it’s probably because I let my subconscious go on a rant about how insufficient I am. But the difference is that I recognize that now and have steps I take to get back on track. If you want to take control of this, here are a few steps to take.
Journal, everyday. There is no right or wrong way to do this. Wait, there is a wrong way – not doing it. The way I journal is very simple and quick – how I am feeling, what I am grateful for, and what I did that day. Sometimes I take five minutes; sometimes I take twenty. But I always feel so good after doing it. Take inventory of your thoughts. We have so many thoughts throughout the day, so what are you telling yourself? By recognizing what you are saying to yourself subconsciously and consciously, you can decide to get rid of the limitations and invite more encouragement/affirmations.
Practice the four steps of LIFE. Truly, give it an honest try. The first two steps above will help you overcome limitations. Then, give yourself space to dream whether that is taking a walk, adding a brainstorming section to your journal, or talking with a friend who will encourage you. Once you have a dream you are attached to, list out the specific steps you have to take in order to achieve that dream – stick to 90-day plans if you can. Finally, do the dang thing. An idea is just an idea until it has some action. If you feel unsure, remember the true definition of confidence: the willingness to try (Mel Robbins). Confidence is not a feeling, it is an action.
Contact Info:
- Emails: missmorganmohler@gmail.com
- Website: https://missrivervalley.org/meet-miss-st-croix-valley/
- Instagram: https://instagram.com/missstcroixvalley2023?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=&force_isolation=true
Image Credits
Hagios Photo, Carol Anne Standen, Ellis Photography, and K Stewart Photography
